Sunday, November 4, 2012

Rejection is a bitch.

I fear rejecting as much as I fear rejection. You may think there isn't any difference between the two, but oh, there is. Allow me to reiterate: By rejecting I mean saying no to offers, invitations and... people. You probably get what I mean now. Rejection on the other hand, is when I get rejected myself. Mostly in school organizations, positions and friendship circles. Can you imagine what rejection does to my already low self-esteem?

This post is intended to shake me into reality and make me realize that I couldn't and shouldn't put off rejecting someone again. Yes, again. I've gone through the grueling task of telling him no to his apparent feelings towards me thrice now. Unfortunately, he won't take no for an answer.

But I can't give him a yes. Not when studies are my top priority. Not when I don't feel mature enough to be in a relationship yet. Not when I'm still having these unresolved feelings about someone else. And especially not when I just don't feel the same way for him.

Of course, let's not forget how he acts more like a stalker than an admirer.

And also, it's only either you have the feeling or you don't. In this case, I really don't. I'm sorry.

*sidenote: The quote "You either have the feeling or you don't" is from the book Why We Broke Up  by Daniel Handler. It will probably always be one of my favorite novels. And if you haven't read it yet, I recommend that you do so.

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