Post-Horror Movie Viewing

Why is it that every time I watch horror movies I suddenly over think every little thing? Well obviously it's because of the fact that I've just finished watching people being haunted by poltergeists that could suddenly show up behind your back. (Usually when you're in front of the mirror. Can't be vain.) And the possibility that it could happen to me is just too frightening to accept, which is why every after watching these horror movies I:

1. Ask someone to go to the bathroom with me.
2. Sleep with my parents/brother.
3. If I have to sleep alone, the lights will without a doubt be left on.
4. Run down the stairs or up the stairs.
5. Turn on every light in the hallway/kitchen/living room.
6. Sleep with a flashlight next to me.
7. Turn my back every five seconds or so.

I guess it's the feeling that a ghost won't materialize next to me if I do these "precautions". I really don't know what I'd do if a ghost shows itself to me, though. Please don't, ghosts! 

But I'd probably just drop dead or something. By the way, Happy Halloween!

Apathy is a game two can play.

*Forenote: This is quite a bitter post. If you hate whiny vaginas, I suggest you stop reading now.

Semestral break is almost over. And I haven't heard from you during the whole three weeks. No, I won't cry about it. It's come to the point when all the hurt I'm supposed to be feeling has been replaced by numbness.

At least during sembreak I've finally realized - no, accepted, that you only talk to me or notice my feeble existence when you need something from me. I guess I should be hurt over that, but I won't even give you the satisfaction of having granted me misery.

You're just another guy, after all. Don't think that just because I'm not gorgeous, hot, rich, smart, or talented enough that I haven't had my experience with the hell hole people call love.

So please do remember that if you'll be needing me to teach you on a subject, or give you food, or lend you my stuff, the answer will be no. I apologize that I should stop being your puppet; abused because you are well aware of my feelings for you. Feelings which I promise you are now on their way to being completely null and void.

Regrets always come last, sweetie. And here I am, taking pleasure in the mere thought that there will come a day wherein you'll regret taking me for granted.

Two Sentences

As much as I can't force you to love me, I can't force myself to stop eating junk food. Life is unfair.

Wall Candy

For some weird reason, I've been obsessed with rooms since third year high school. From the day I discovered the existence of the epic-ness that is Tumblr, I've been stalking room blogs. It always made me want to revamp my room and turn it into something blog worthy. Unfortunately, given the lack of awesome furniture stores here in Iloilo, I cannot create the "perfect bedroom" that I so long for. That, however, did not stop me from trying to awesomize my room.

This was my first room project:

Please excuse the pictures, I can't afford a DSLR.

This is the only wall that's painted purple. It just had come to the point where I found my white walls so desperately boring and bland. But this was finished sometime December of 2010. I think I might redo it again. Or probably just change the wall quote.

Last night though, I was looking at room blogs again and I wanted another upgrade in my room. So I kind of rearranged my room, and fixed my desk area. At least now there are two less boring walls in my room.

To explain, this isn't my handwriting. I printed out this quote using the "Brain Flower" font I downloaded online. I cut each letter manually, and stuck them to the wall using Elmer's Glue. I know, amateur, right?

*side note: I chose this quote because of the cruel honesty it offers, and how much I actually apply it onto my life.
*another side note: The quote is from the book Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky. If you haven't read it yet, I recommend that you do so. You won't regret it.

This also got me thinking... did I choose the wrong course for college? Dammit. Me and my indecisiveness.

On being delusional.

"As Long As You Love Me" by Justin Bieber has been stuck in my head for days now. Though you may be his hater, I happen to be a Belieber. So sue me for being so immature, awkward, weird, and insert any other adjective you'd try to demean Beliebers with.

But... "As long as you love me, we could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke." Really, Justin? You think we can keep our future children alive just by loving each other? I'm starting to think that I should just break up with you before our future children undergo starvation and multiple diseases from our lack of shelter.

Adam's Playlist

Most people who know me personally would probably be aware of the fact that Maroon 5 is my addiction. Perhaps not all of their songs are my favorites, but all of them I find good. I have downloaded all of their albums and have listened to them repeatedly. No, I'm not the fan who only started to like them because of their popular anthems "Payphone" and "Moves Like Jagger".

Maroon 5's songs always have substance, and whenever I'm sucked into another one of my black holes of despair, it's them I turn to. Adam Levine's voice crooning + a tub of ice cream is usually enough to ease the pain. But let's not make this post about me. My intention (with this post) is to share with you the legendary Maroon 5.

I don't think I'm qualified enough to speak for them, so let them speak sing for themselves. Here's a list of their less famous songs that I really think should be heard by everyone:

1. Sunday Morning; Songs About Jane (2002)
2. Harder to Breathe; Songs About Jane (2002)
3. Nothing Lasts Forever; It Won't Be Soon Before Long (2007)
4. Not Falling Apart; It Won't Be Soon Before Long (2007)
5. Better That We Break; It Won't Be Soon Before Long (2007)
6. Infatuation; It Won't Be Soon Before Long (2007)
6. Stutter; Hands All Over (2010)
7. I Can't Lie; Hands All Over (2010)
8. How; Hands All Over (2010)
9. Just a Feeling; Hands All Over (2010)
10. Beautiful Goodbye; Overexposed (2012)
11. Daylight; Overexposed (2012)
12. Love Somebody; Overexposed (2012)
13. Sad; Overexposed (2012)
14. Wipe Your Eyes; Overexposed (2012)
15. Lucky Strike; Overexposed (2012)

The point of this post is for me to stress that not only the popular and mainstream music are the songs which are worthy of your eardrums. A lot of songs which don't make it in the charts are actually better, not just in terms of beat but also in lyrics.

Or maybe this is just my pathetic little self still holding out for the day when Adam Levine will recognize my existence and fall madly in love with me. And of course we'll have babies! But now I've just gone from awkward to slightly delusional.

A Letter to my Angel

Alyssa Marie Naranjo. The first time I saw you was during the first day of class in high school. We were already required to wear our full uniforms but for some reason, you were one of the three who wore civilian clothes. I never asked you about that, though. I guess it always slipped my mind when we were together. But you know why I suddenly remembered this? It’s because I realized that it was always in you to stand out.

You were never just a face in the crowd, fleeting and easily forgettable. With your smile that could brighten up anyone’s day, there was a certain gravity that drew people to you. It certainly made me want to get to know you, to be your friend. Although it took two years until we could formally meet and be friends, it’s safe to say that it was worth the wait.

During our third year of high school, both of us auditioned for Ripples, our school’s publication. That was probably the first time we had a conversation. We were both so worked up about our applications, wondering if the jurors would find our audition pieces worthy to be published under the school’s name. When the results finally came out, and we were both in, I remember us hugging and telling each other “I knew you could get in!”. From then on, you were always one of the few people who believed in me, who encouraged me and kept reassuring me. Thank you for that Yssa. You could never imagine how much that means for a pessimist and self-hater like me.

Come fourth year high school, Ripples was given to the seniors as our responsibility. Both of us, along with the editor-in-chief, Ennah and other senior editors, Francesca and Chanelle would spend late nights in the publishing house – Makinaugalingon. Though at that time I saw those nights as a burden, making me exhausted when I come home and leaving me no more energy to study, right now I realize that I will be forever indebted to those nights. Why? It was where we got to spend much time together, thus, strengthening our bond and friendship. It was where we exchanged secrets, gossiped and made fun of each other.

Do you remember when I was debating over which school I wanted to attend during college? You were the one who told me to attend UPV so that you wouldn’t be alone. You even said, in our native tongue, of course, that “Lesh, please don’t leave me!”. Albeit not being the final assessor of my university, it was surely one of the reasons why I attended UPV. But oh, the irony of the situation – it seems you were the one who left me.

I can’t be bitter over that, though. I know you’re happy up there right now. Although I’d prefer if you were still here with me, worrying about how Chem 16 will go next sem, I can’t be selfish. I know you’ll always be with me, guiding me.

But Yssa, I will do my best to fulfill the plans we made together. I will take summer classes in UP Diliman, like we both wanted to. I will never give up reaching the stage where I can don the pristine white uniform of the Public Health third years. Sasablay din ako! (I will graduate from UPV!) And our biggest dream? I promise to finish medical school and be a doctor. Hopefully I’ll get into UP PGH, Yss. Because now, what I’ll be achieving is not just for myself, it’s for you too. You are now inevitably, a part of me.

Happy seventeenth birthday, Yssa! I love you and I'll be seeing you.

Narnia: The Lesh version

Yep, this is one of those cheesy what's-in-the-bag posts except mine features my pencil case! If you've read my previous post, you would know that I lost my pencil case and I was monstrously close to having a breakdown. But of course I realized it was replaceable, so no tantrums for me!

Taking advantage of the fact that I was going to a mall today, one of the first things I did was to buy a new pencil case + its contents. The following are the "wondrous content" that I've referred to in my post *Dying. And yes, I am well aware that I've only heightened your judgment of me as a very awkward person. I blame my genes OCD.

Why I can't study without them:

1. Colorful stick-its. Marks the important pages of my books.

2. Stabilo Exam Grade #2 pencils. I tend to make dozens of mistakes when I study equations, so pencils are a must. & it needs to be that brand because its impression on paper is really good.

3. Stabilo Exam Grade eraser. Not only does it come free with the pencils, but it's the only eraser capable of erasing the aforementioned pencils' marks completely.

4. Faber Castell sharpener. This one's a cheat, actually. I prefer the Stabilo Exam Grade sharpener, however, they were out of stock earlier today. But they'll still sharpen my pencils, so good enough.

5. Yellow dermatograph. There's something about yellow that makes it easier for me to memorize things. & of course, highlighting things makes it easier to spot important terms & concepts in my books. I prefer highlighting my books with a dermatograph though because its mark doesn't seep through the opposite page.

6. Pilot G-tec C4 (blue ink). I can't study my notes if my handwriting isn't neat, and this is the only pen that makes my handwriting look acceptable.

7. Rewrite correction tape. It doesn't have to be that brand, but I need correction tape to cover up my clumsiness on paper.

8. Permanent marker. Not a necessity for me to study, but I might need it.

You can't doubt my OCD now, can you?

*Dying

Just now I decided that I wanted to doodle on my Wreck This Journal. I got up to look for my pencil case and the wondrous content it held, but much to my demise - it's gone. What cruelty for an OCD like me! I honestly cannot study or do any actual writing without my trusty Pilot G-tec C4. And it needs to be blue ink. Nor can I doodle without my Stabilo ExamGrade pencils + matching ExamGrade eraser.

But the bigger problem is, I've most likely gone mad! I mean, who writes a ridiculous rant post about losing writing materials?

Why I'm Broke (Most of the Time)

With the increase of prices on books (fiction, not schoolbooks), I decided that maybe spending all of my allowance on them isn't worth it anymore. I mean, I read a book twice at most. That being said, I asked my mom to get me a tab for the purpose of downloading eBooks so I could save. Unfortunately, I realized that I still prefer paper over technology. Even though I have my tab now, if I find a really good book, I purchase it without having any second thoughts.

But why do I still buy paperback or hardbound books even though downloading it online is already an option? Probably because from the moment I crack open the book, I get sucked into reading immediately. The smell of paper is enough to coax me. Plus, that feeling where every time I turn the page there's a new story waiting for me - each page holds the promise of something new; perhaps even a twist.

Maybe that's not reasonable enough for you to spend P300-P500 on each book, but there's just something about printed books that gets me. Somehow, I feel like I'm really in the story when I read paperback books. Forgive me for me choosiness and weirdness.

I wonder how much money I spent on all these...
*Special thanks to my supportive mom and best friends who give me books on special occasions. Love you, guys!

NO, I'M NOT ADDICTED. HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME.

So what if the dorm is haunted?

Creepy hallways, eerie sounds, numerous ghost stories... Just a few items listed in the resume of a UPV college dormitory. What with me being a scaredy-cat (I can't sleep alone without a night light), you wouldn't expect me to live in a place that is supposedly haunted. And honestly, if private dorms around UP didn't cost a lot more, I wouldn't have stayed in Balay Kanlaon. But what I expected to be a nightmare complete with white ladies and other vengeful ghouls turned out to be one of the best things that happened to me.

Here are a few reasons why I've come to love living in a dorm. Well, not just any dorm - Balay Kanlaon.

1. Free food
Food always makes dreaded things a little more tolerable. With dozens of people living with you, there's always bound to be food from someone, somewhere. Thank God for the unwritten rule of mandatory food sharing with dorm mates.

2. Extended wardrobe

When a costume is needed for a certain activity and you don't have it in your closet, chances are one of your roommates or dorm mates would have it! Ask nicely, and you will be spared from spending money to buy something you'll most probably wear only once.

3. The break haven

When you have two hours to kill before your next class, having a dorm so near to the school is a convenience. Sneaking a nap between breaks is always an option - yay for the somnolent kids like me! Plus, rest always recharges one's energy. If your next class is a major subject (or a feeling major subject), that energy is very much needed.

4. Built-in study buddies
Living with your block mates, classmates, and course mates makes studying a whole lot easier. Arguably, it may not be just a piece of cake with the intensity of the lessons, but at least you can always count on having someone to immediately explain things you didn't fully grasp in class. Plus, you can exchange ideas and immediately correct each other's errors.

5. Parental figures
One of the reasons we choose to live in dorms is to escape our parents for awhile, right? But we've got to admit that sometimes we do need guidance. With us being away from our parents, it's a good thing there are upperclassmen who live in the dorm. They actually take care of us when we're sick, and "help us with our homework". Yep, the upperclass in BK are not only there to wipe our tears that come with heartbreak, they also teach us what they know about the subjects we're taking.
*Special mention Nong David, Nong Jorge and Nong Kevin!

6. A home away from home
I admit that I don't know half the people in BK personally, but in our wing (Wing A!), I've found a new family. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I'm shunting my biological family, but it's nice to have found another group of people that you can trust. My wing mates, along with most of the upperclassmen, have made Balay Kanlaon my second home.

Balay Kanlaon has been a very significant part of my UP experience. I'm just glad the horror stories didn't drive me away.

The First Wreckage

As promised, I wrecked my Wreck This Journal. Not really sure if what I did was wrecking, though. This had no spontaneity; I cheated and worked on an Aztec-ish design for an hour or so. I apologize for the amateur doodles - I'm not much of an artist.

Instruction: Use this as a test page for pens, paints, markers, or art supplies.
What I did instead: Something systematic. *face palm

Someone help me seriously wreck this journal.

Mondays can be beautiful.

Distance lets you know who cares enough to keep you in their lives and who couldn't wait to let go of you. Graduating from high school just last year, I was unfortunate enough to say goodbye to my best friends. They chose to attend colleges in Manila, while I attended UP Miag-ao, just three towns away from Iloilo City. Albeit not forever, five months is still a long time to go without seeing your best friends in person.

Today, I got to see two of my best-est friends again. It was refreshing to see how easy we could just pick up right where we left off.

Snickers pie from Maridel's courtesy of Ruod

Let's continue to keep each other in our lives. Chos. Cheesiness Level-Up!

It's not easy to lose.

I can't not write a post about weight.

First of all, let me apologize for having nothing else to do but write about something that just randomly popped into my head just now. But this is first and foremost my blog, and thus, it should contain my thoughts.

Let me just get this off my chest, okay - Why is it so easy to gain weight and so immensely difficult to lose it?

Point #1
It took me twelve sessions of circuit training program (for our PE class) to go from 49 kilos to 45. So, I lost four kilos. Just four! In the duration of... one semester!

Point #2
Only one week of semestral break has passed. And boom - 2 pounds (not kilos) immediately regained. Need I say more?

But honestly, who would prefer doing actual physical activities which would involve sweating and the exhausted feeling that's coupled with it versus sitting in front of the TV with a bag of Doritos and a can of Coke in hand? Or maybe it's just the luxury of having to do nothing during this sembreak that's making me lazy. HAHAHA, NO. I am and will be perpetually lazy.

XOXO, bring me pizza.

Chicken Soup

Chicken soup is usually attributed to being the ultimate comfort food for the sick. There's just something about it that makes you feel better, or so they say. But my chicken soup? Friends.

No, I'm not trying to imply that I'm a cannibal. Though I do prefer meat over vegetables, I highly doubt that I would ever take a liking to human meat. Okay, okay - getting to the point. These past few days I got sick (yes, cough and colds and all). As soon as my friends Tommy and Andrea knew I was sick, they came to visit me.

We did what we always do when we hang out: watch a horror movie. This time, it was The Innkeeper. Although let me say that this horror movie wasn't as terrifying as the other movies we've watched before. Also, we sang karaoke and ate a bunch of junk food! (Happy tummy is happy!)

Their being here and giving effort to make me feel better did make me feel better. I think I only coughed 5 times today. Really. I guess laughter (+ fun) really is the best medicine. I owe them both for "healing" me today.

But let me not leave out that for every hanging out, cam-whoring is always involved. Forgive us for being insanely crazy and vain.

P.S. Walang basagan ng trip. (No raining on our parade.)

Chos, feeling models lang?

Jeje pose

Now I'm embarrassed.

Love you, guys! Thanks for being my chicken soup. 'Til next time.

The Grade Debate

With the posting of grades for the first semester, lately I've been reading tweets, statuses and blogposts which state that a grade is just another number or that grades don't matter in the future. And the most demeaning of all - just because you get high grades doesn't mean you're smart.

I don't get what they're trying to achieve with that. Are they trying to make those who get good grades feel bad? Don't you think they deserve what they get since they've actually worked hard for it? And it does require intelligence to understand lessons, you know.

I understand that grades don't actually define one's future. I mean, it's a known fact that Bill Gates is a college drop out, right? But we can't ignore the fact that grades do contribute in one's success rate in the future, no matter how miniscule. For example, if one wants to attend a good medical school like UP PGH, a Cum Laude title is required. Now tell me, how does one get a Cum Laude title? Yep - grades.

No, I'm not trying to say that those who get 3's or lower are dumb. You're obviously not! It's just because you're in a challenging school, or have terror teachers, or the subject is just not your forte.

My point is, you don't have to insult those who get good grades. I'd guess that most people actually want good grades. 

I agree that our lives should not revolve around grades, and it shouldn't be the only thing that matters to us.But right now as students? Education is our first priority. We shouldn't just shrug off our studies.

Why I felt the need to write this...

I try to get good grades because I want to give my parents something in return for all the sacrifices they have made for me. I want them to be proud of me. Please stop saying that grades are everything to me. They're not. But for an insecure and a pessimist like me, it actually feels good to have some sense of achievement.

This is for you, person who told me that grades are the only thing I can offer since I'm not actually smart, just diligent. I'm so sorry I can't be naturally intelligent.

I Break Spines

Today was a supposed to be a horror movie marathon day with two of my closest high school friends Tommy and Andrea. However, due to circumstances (I hate you, coughing) the bonding was postponed tomorrow.

Seeing as I have nothing to do for the day, I've decided to be productive. I will finally, finally, wreck my Wreck This Journal. Wreck This Journal is an instructional book by Keri Smith which basically instructs me to make it unrecognizable as a book when I'm through with it. Sounds easy enough, right? Not for an OC (Obsessive Compulsive) like me. But then again, my cousin did give me that book to help me with my OCD. So I'll wreck it, then! I guess it's better to let it serve its purpose rather than to merely allow it to collect dust.

Also, I have two other books by Keri Smith courtesy of my best friend, Francesca Tang. So there's another two that will possibly cure me of my obsessive-compulsiveness. Possibly. *insert wink here

Let's get down to business!
First step: crack the spine.
Anyone who knows me personally also knows the fact that I loathe getting creases in my books. But my loathing for creases is exceeded by the presence of cracks in a book's spine. (Told you I'm OC.) But here it is... I cracked the spine of my Wreck This Journal!

I think my heart died a little. No, really.

All things cheddar, mozzarella and parmesan.

I don't think I've ever really appreciated notes before. No, not notes in class. We all know how important those notes are - if we want to pass. But the notes I'm referring to are a couple of sentences scribbled down to get across something you want to say in a very brief manner.

Those notes I used to take for granted. Until you gave them to me. *Boom! I bet that line got you thinking, "Holy shizz, this girl's a hopeless romantic." And I am. Totally. I won't even try to deny that. But I'm not a cheese ball. I used to take just one look at notes and throw them away, even if it came from a crush. Because aren't they just shrug-offs? Something they can't even bother to tell you in person?

Somehow though, whenever I'd read the notes you've implanted on my laptop, or on my phone, or on my tab, or stuck outside my dorm room door - I'd think otherwise. I'd think (or hope) that you've given thought to them, and that you've given me a little piece of you to hold on to when we're not together. (Again, let me take time to apologize for how awfully cheesy this post is. But don't say the title didn't warn you.)

Okay, maybe it's not that way at all. Actually, it obviously isn't! I'm the only one who likes you. I mean, it is a known fact that other girls like you but between us two? It's a one-way thing. Most likely. Definitely. I wouldn't even dare to hope. The point is, those notes just made me feel like you think about me once in awhile too. And tell me, who doesn't want to be remembered by someone they like?

I guess that's why your notes are kept in pristine condition inside my wallet. I guess that's why I take time to look at them once a day. I guess that's why notes are valuable to me now - from anyone. And maybe it has nothing to do with me liking you a lot. Oops.

"The" Reading List

Everyone is entitled to their own addiction. Yours may be drugs (please rethink that, though) or food or shopping, but mine settles on transporting myself to a different world; experiencing someone else's life. Yep, books are to me as weed is to hippies.

Being that it's already semestral break, which lasts three weeks in college, I get the luxury of spending my time the way I want it to. No papers to write, no handouts to memorize, no classes to attend! Since I've already stressed that I'm a self-confessed bibliophile, let me share with you my sembreak reading list. 10 books in three weeks? Challenge accepted! Chances are, I would add more books to that list. Suggestions, anyone?

P.S. Please forgive my awkward doodles and unkempt handwriting.

I will go down with this ship

*pre-post note: No, this post is not about the song. It's about my ships, and not the sailboat/kayak/banana boat kind. Ship as in romantic pairings that I support.

"The" real post.
As much as I ship Percy and Annabeth, Draco and Hermione, Katniss and Peeta, Phineas and Isabella, Jane and Billy + Barney and Robin, I ship you and me too. But I guess that last ship is the most improbable one, isn't it?

The Depression Playlist

Melancholy has been my companion as of late. It has gotten so acquainted with me that the depression it’s giving me can’t be fixed with milk tea and red velvet cupcakes. I know because I tried ate.

This depression digs deep, so much to the point that I’ve been crying a lot lately. To support this, I’ll give a lone situation:  I cried to one of my best friends in college because I thought that I was the subject of one of his blog posts, which had very demeaning words. Paranoia and pessimism – check!

For now, I have no willpower to put into words the root of all this misery and frustration I’ve been feeling.

So pertaining to this post’s title, here is a list of songs I’ve kept on listening to for the past few weeks. I didn’t know just how accurate some lyrics could define one’s life.  In this case, of course, my life.

1. Fix You (cover) - Boyce Avenue ft. Tyler Ward

When you love someone but it goes to waste, could it be worse?

2. I'm Yours - The Script

I never feel I'm quite enough.

3. I Swear This Time I Mean It - Mayday Parade

And you could crush me, but please don't crush me 'cause baby, I'm a dreamer for sure.

4. Therapy - All Time Low

A handful of moments, I wish I could change.

5. Sad - Maroon 5

Wondering if I really tried everything I could, not knowing if I should try a little harder.

6. Sick Little Games - All Time Low

I'm losing the best of me; dressed up as myself to live in the shadow of who I'm supposed to be.

7. Some Nights (cover) - Before You Exit

What do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know anymore.

And lastly, my anthem for the moment:

8. You Make Me Wanna Die - The Pretty Reckless

I'll never be good enough, you make me wanna die.

*side note: No, this does not mean I'm emo, or suicidal. I could never bring myself to end my own life. I'm just currently very depressed and frustrated with my life. But I can cope. God never gives you problems you can't handle, right?

*side note of the side note: Yes, I'm a Catholic.

Sorry for a bunch of sad feelings all merged in one late night, bored wannabe blogger post. 

Color Play

Enjoying Pixlr-o-matic with college best buds Jiggy Fernandez, Rigel Villaruel and Macky Estanda. And although I might be a wannabe blogger, I wouldn't even dream of being a photo blogger. I ain't got the skills~

Final post for tonight/early morning, promise.

On apathy.

There is no cure for boredom.

For awhile, you might find something to occupy your mind but eventually, you'll still grow tired of whatever you're doing. Infinity exists not for any one action after all. Hence, boredom strikes again.

It's an unceasing cycle, but that shouldn't let anyone resort to letting their boredom completely consume them. That would entail the nothingness of a person - a person sucked into their very own black hole, lost in the dark and being utterly useless against the strong force of laziness.

And slightly being hypocrite... I think I may have found my "permanent" temporary remedy to boredom - blogging.